So...Now What?

It's hard to believe that nearly two years ago I started my international adoption plans. At that time I wasn’t quite frantic yet, after all I still had plenty of time. I hoped (still hope) that I’d meet a great guy and fall in love and we’d get married and have a bunch of kids. Fast forward to today and with the recent and sudden loss of my Mom, I no longer feel like I have "plenty of time". So here I am researching my options yet again. I am clear about what I want; I want to be a mom. So, the same old question is, how? I researched again the option of switching countries, but there's no clear winner there. I also researched domestic adoption, but I'm still not sure I can handle that. Then most recently, my best friend quietly suggested to me if I would consider meeting with a Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE) to pursue fertility treatments?

Flashback to when I first decided to be a single mom, truth be told I really only considered adoption. I knew without a doubt that I could love a child that was not biologically my own. But now...I wonder if I would later regret not having the pregnancy experience, or at the very least regret that I didn't attempt to get pregnant, otherwise I might always wonder, WHAT IF? I can always adopt later if I choose, but realistically there is a smaller window of time for me to conceive a child.

So, two weeks ago I had my first fertility consultation; it went very well and now I'm fighting my insurance to pay for the treatments, so again more discouragement because they automatically denied me. But, I'm not giving up that easy! I might even pay for it myself and hope that my insurance will come through for me later.